Monday, June 28, 2010

Sifting through the sands of time

Sift: To separate and retain the course parts

To question closely

To distinguish as if separating with a sieve

To examine and sort carefully

That relationship brought out my weaknesses…my wounds.

It brought to surface my dormant wounds. The wounds and beliefs that were “secretly” driving my life. The puppet master controlling my thoughts and behaviours. Beliefs that I didn’t even know existed. Beliefs about myself – not good enough, not special enough, inferior… Ingrained and accepted…without even knowing.

Brought to the surface. His stuff pulled out my stuff. Energetically it magnetized and attached on to mine and pulled it up to the surface. What was this? What was going on? I thought it was him that had the emotional issues. Indeed he did, that is how it pulled up my dormant and similar ones. His, so strong and apparent (to me) that they had the strong pull of a magnet and pulled mine up from deep within.

My strong attachment to him was the attachment to my wounds. It was a match. I just didn’t know what it really was. I thought it was a deep connection to another, one of soul mates, one of … close to love. I guess it was a deep connection, because it was a strong attachment…to some dense wounds.

Brought my toxicity to the surface. Where they really needed to be. Where they really wanted to be so they can be seen. SEEN. Seen for what they really are. Old wounds. Not true. False beliefs.

Brought to the surface to be sifted through. Separating the useless stuff from the useable stuff.

1 comment:

  1. I think the more you 'love' him -and I write between commas because that cannot be considered love-the more attached you'll be to those wounds and viceversa. And that IS what really IS, Wounds + attachment--- that does not equal LOVE.

    It's High Time You Turned The PAge and give place and chance to somebody NEW into your life.
    Easier said than done...

    Why is it we only love those who have failed us or left us or rejected us, and we do not value those who accept us, and respect us and love us the way we are?
    I speak from my own experience.oh- It's always the same.

    Sweet hug